World

1.7.2015

What Milk Made is Thankful For 2014

Gemma has returned to us and all is right with the world
Behold, the glory of the Minaj Ass
Duck for cover! Ebola headed our way!!
Johnny Depp, werking the men's crop top since 1984
Matthew McConaughey celebrating his new McConaissance
Yasss Azealia, your new album is as fierce as your banter
Donatella Versace participating in the best/worst Ice Bucket clip

Although we gave Thanksgiving a hard time with our list of the Most Fucked Family Dinners, it truly is the perfect time to step back and reflect on the things in life that we appreciate most. 2014 in particular has been a rough year, with widespread protests across the world and strife around every corner, it helps to think of all that made us happy and, well, thankful, for some of the hilarious, bizarre, and downright amazing things that happened this year. So without further ado, here is our list of What We’re Thankful for in 2014.

1. Nicki Minaj’s Butt: With a little (lot) of sampling of 90’s one hit wonders and the sheer force of her buns, Nicki Minaj brought us one of the most pervasive cultural revolutions of the year, the Year of the Anaconda. While it’s a little jarring to hear small children yelling about skinny bitches in the club, it is overshadowed by the power harnessed in Nicki’s rear end. Thank you for blessing us Queen Minaj.

2. Not Having Ebola: America went full blown crazy town when the first case of Ebola hit our shores, and for good reason. Ain’t nobody got time for a nasty blood spewing virus, especially when it hits as close to home as the taxis of NYC. So even though there are sadly millions still suffering in West Africa, you better put a smile on your face that you have a clean bill of health.

3. The Man’s Crop Top: Feminism at its core is about equality of the sexes, and one of the best ways that came about in the fashion world this year was for men to start showing a lot more skin. Though the man’s crop top has been around since the 80’s, this summer saw it’s quite glorious return. From Kid Cudi to the Alexander Wang H&M collection, they are now everywhere and here to stay. Hello washboard abs, nice to see you!

4. The McConnaisance Still Going Strong: If you had told us in 2004 that Matthew McConaughey would become an Academy Award winning, actual good actor who would still be sexy in 10 years, we would have laughed your ass out. Yet lo and behold, here we are in the middle of the year of the McConnaisance, wherein an almost career killed rom-com star won an Oscar, slayed as the lead in True Detective and blockbuster Interstellar, all without having to take off his shirt.

5. Azealia Banks FINALLY Drops her Album: Sometimes artists take a while to release music, be it from creative ruts or studio shenanigans, and that’s fine. But what’s not fine is releasing one of the most game changing, balls to the walls club bangers ever written and following it with two whole years of trash talking with not a note of music to back it up. As it turned out, it was worth the wait, as Ms. Banks sent us a real blessing with Broke With Expensive Taste, one of the most unique and awe inspiring hip hop albums in recent memory.

6. The Return of Gemma Ward: The fashion world was stunned when glam girl extraordinaire Gemma Ward announced her retirement from modeling to pursue acting at the ripe old age of 20. She did in fact rear her head in some major productions, such as The Strangers and Pirates of the Caribbean 4, but her absence was still strongly felt in runways around the world. An absence that came to an end at the Prada SS15 show during Milan Fashion Week, where fashion lovers everywhere breathed a joyous sigh of relief; she’s back.

7. The Ice Bucket Challenge is Over: Out of all the odd events that have come about through social media, the Ice Bucket Challenge takes the cake. Literally everyone and their Grandmother took to Facebook and Twitter to douse themselves in freezing water to fight ALS disease, resulting in great shirtless shots and a hell ton of redundant, annoying posts in our newsfeeds. We’re all for fighting disease, but we could not be happier that the challenge has ended.

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