Zac Efron + Dwayne Johnson's Abs Bring Back Baywatch
The world is about to get a lot steamier and, this time, we can’t blame global warming. In a move that has housewives, gays, and everyone else with a pulse sweatin, it’s been announced that an R-rated movie remake of Baywatch is happening. The original show ran from 1989 to 2001 and was responsible for an entire generation’s sexual awakening so the bar is suitably high for the film version. Luckily, the talent taking over beach babe patrol from David Hasselhoff and Pamela Anderson will be the slightly frightening and highly arousing duo of Zac Efron and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s six-packs.
Prepare for some red short shorts realness as the two hotties with rock hard bodies star in a remake that’s less about drowning and more about environmental protection. Yes, you read that right. Based on the few plot details circulating it appears that Johnson is going to be the straight-laced lifeguard to Efron’s bad boy rule-breaking hothead. Through an inevitable montage of slow-motion running scenes and straight bro bonding they’ll team up to fight against the big bad oil baron trying to destroy their beach. The only thing worse than sand in your shorts is oil in the water, right?
The good news is that while you wait for the waves and babes of Baywatch to make their big screen debut, you can sit back and reminisce on the decade you spent discovering your sexuality through the red shorts, hot bods, and slow motion scenes of Hasselhoff and Anderson’s OG beach drama. The bad news? Production isn’t set to begin until February of 2016 because, hey, it takes a long time to gather enough baby oil to properly coat Johnson and Efron’s muscles.