David Bowie Scores the New Spongebob Musical + Our Wish List

What do David Bowie, Dirty Projectors, and John Legend all have in common? They’re all working on a musical adaptation of Spongebob Squarepants, the cartoon crustacean we’ve been following for over a decade. Starting in 1999, the show has kept a cult following til now with nine seasons and two movies (both of which did very well at the box office). We’re just trying to imagine what kind of anthem Bowie has in mind for the yellow sponge and his kooky adventures. And it’s got us thinking, what other cartoon musicals are we missing in our lives, and who absolutely needs to score them?

Rocket Power

Nothing made you want to be the ‘sporty kid’ as badly as Rocket Power did back in it’s hey day. From the fabulous fashion to the sick kick flips, we can only imagine the kind of choreography that would go into a musical like that, but we know we want it. And who better to encapsulate extremity of any sport like Animal Collective? The wacky, noise-rock auteurs know just how to keep the music coasting (and more importantly, when to rev it up). We can already see the gang skating around the rinks to the likes of the 6-minute electric rave Brothersport or surfing through some tubes to the psyched out acid wash of Peacebone. We’re just thinking about all the fast paced action we would get from that combo and it’s almost too dizzying (almost).

Hey Arnold!

Being a city kid never looked any cooler than it did when watching Hey Arnold! after school. And what screams cool city kid more than Janelle Monae? While Hey Arnold! was a fun cartoon, the show was known to deal with darker subjects as the kids grew up in an inner city life. From ‘Give’ Em What They Love’ to ‘Yoga’ the spunky little opera singer is ready for whatever tone that Arnold and his gang can throw at her.


When you have a ride or die crew like Tommy Pickles does, you need a ride or die crew to match. Even though Rugrats focuses on the day to day life of toddlers, we all know it’s so much more than that. As the bald ring leader always said, ‘A baby’s gotta do what a baby’s gotta do,’ and that’s why we chose Wu-Tang Clan to rep the gang that got shit done, full diaper or not. Truth be told, we’re kind of hoping to get Honey Boo Boo cast in this play, but that’s beside the point. Also, can you imagine a group of wobbly babies coming at you rapping ‘Protect Ya Neck’?

Rocko’s Modern Life

This one feels a little obvious. If you weren’t a fan of The B 52’s before you sat down for your first episode of Rocko’s Modern Life, you had to be immediately after. The pop rock group penned the intro to the cartoon that featured wild patterns, colors, and an array of characters so surreal (remember Nipple Man?) that the two were a match made in heaven. If we could get a full two hour musical of the Australian wallabys absurd life backed by ‘Rock Lobster,’ that would be a true 90s kid’s dream come true.


There was one show that really epitomized what it means to a sad, white boy, Doug was that show. So what better band to back a sad white boy than the saddest of the sad groups, The Killers. With frontman Brandon Flowers leading us through our angsty woes, who says Doug Funnie couldn’t do a super sweet rendition of ‘Mr. Brightside’ with a banjo? With just the right amount of sappiness and solid riffs, it’s the perfect soundtrack for the perpetual eighth dance that is Doug’s life.

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