5 Ways Pokémon Go Is Making The World More Hilarious
The world has its first augmented reality (AR) success story, and it’s Pokémon Go. We’re all busy stopping mid-walk, pointing our phones at different angles, and swiping away at invisible monsters. It’s the type of behavior that, up until last week, would have gotten us institutionalized, but now simply earns a cavalcade of awkward stares. Clearly, humanity is evolving. Here are just five ways Pokémania is changing how we live.
We’re taking pictures of our toilets.
Magritte once wrote about the treachery of our own imagination. “Ceci n’est pas une pipe.” Here, almost a century later, Magritte’s words have grown in magnitude, with the resonance of a man trapped in a toilet bowl. Though there are countless Pokémon Go photos that seem to capture creatures in flagrante defecatom, they’re actually just photos of a toilet with a filter superimposed. Y’all are taking photos of your shitter for internet points.
More people are catching more Pokémon than dates.
Nintendo’s videogame has surpassed Tinder in active users, proving once and for all that it’s easier to be a Pokemaster than get a second date. But, perhaps, the Pokemon Go app can do double-duty. As New York Magazine noted, Craigslist Missed Connections have been alight with Pokemon Go-related posts.
Lil B predicted this timeline.
Six years ago, Lil B “The Based God” blessed us with unseen truth. We were blind to it then. How could Pikachu, a fictional character, escape the digital and animated realm to become something more? But we did not doubt the Based God, and lo, our faith was rewarded. Pikachu is outside. We are all outside. #tybg
— Harry (@HarryCFC_) July 7, 2016
People are going outside to play videogames.
It’s brilliant. Nintendo has successfully incentivized doing errands for Mom outside of boring normal rewards such as keeping the family together. Now, you’re not just going to the nearby grocers for eggs and milk, you’re going for eggs and milk and quests.
For too long, outside and videogames having been diametrically opposed. Sunglare versus screenglare. Vitamin D versus Taco Bell’s Cool Ranch Dorito Tacos. Entering society versus swearing at random strangers online. No more. The convergence of videogame and real-life spheres is upon us, and Mom cannot flippin’ believe it.
People are committing and solving crime via the app.
Forget Lindsay Lohan in Get a Clue. Forget Harriet the Spy. There’s a new sleuth in town and her name is Shayla Wiggins. Wiggins was playing Pokémon Go, seeking out new Pokémon near the Wind River in Wyoming, when she instead caught sight of an unidentified body floating down the river. “Who’s that Pokémon?” is now a question for the coroner.
Meanwhile, a group of tech-savvy Missourian thieves lured unwitting teens into a trap, by using the draw of app. The criminals successfully relieved 11 teens of their Pokéballs, Pokéchange, and Poképhones before police caught on and put an end to their Team Rocket-inspired villainy.
Stay tuned to Milk for more Pokémania.
Cover Images courtesy of Insider. Images courtesy of Imgur, Giphy.