The dank life chose him.



Bernie Sanders is in Full Support of The Ganja

Democratic candidate and glorious memespiration Bernie Sanders is officially down with the dank. He recently came out in support of removing marijuana from the long, long, long list of drugs outlawed by the feds-dot-gov. While some states have already legalized weed, there are still laws being implemented at the federal level which allow police to carry out raids on dispensaries. At the same time, kids are still going to jail for smoking a joint on the wrong street corner. The Bern’s proposal wouldn’t completely decriminalize weed on the federal level, but simply make legalization a much easier process for states nationwide. They would be able to legalize the drug and regulate it in much the way they regulate alcohol and tobacco products, all without having to worry about Washington killing their buzz. Because everyone knows that Washington is, like, a total narco who only gets invited to anything because she offers to pay. But keep that on the DL.

She’s secretly paying for our stash.

This would also have huge impact on some of the highest states in the land. Medical marijuana centers still have trouble finding funding because so many banks simply refuse to help them. While Colorado has made the effort by setting up a credit union just for them, the Federal Reserve recently killed the move because they didn’t want their money smelling like Stevie Wonder. Mo’ money means mo’ problems, but having no money still fucking sucks. And if you think that recreational centers are fairing any better, well, they’re suffering too.

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Every one of them.

On top of that, both centers suffer from constant police raids despite this being a big no-no. And then, after a long, successful session of let’s-fuck-shit-up these guys like to unwind by eating the evidence.


This is kind of a big deal, not only because of what it means for businesses. It also affects people who just wanna hang with Mary Jane. Maybe invite her to Netflix and chill, with a heavy emphasis on the chill (and the Netflix, tbh).” Some states have decriminalized certain amounts of weed, and that’s great and all. But this becomes a game of numbers, where kids can be put away for having a little less or slightly more than the legal amount on their person, all based on the whims of the officer. A possession charge haunts someone and can fetch them anywhere from fifteen months to fifteen years depending on the state. It’s hard to come back from something like that. Weed ruins lives, but only because of laws that the feds have put in place.

With legalization, stoners will no longer be federally prosecuted for utilizing the standards that American favorites like Dave Chappelle, Susan Sarandon, and Padma Lakshmi all hold so near and dear.  And this is something that the Berns understands. During his talk at George Mason University, he noted that, ““too many Americans have seen their lives destroyed because they have criminal records as a result of marijuana use…That’s wrong. That has got to change.” So, legalizing weed to literally save lives. We can get behind that.

Bernie’s’ campaign for Baddest Bitch in the Land is going pretty well.

Bernie Sanders is the only candidate who has come out in full support the drug’s legalization, with Martin O’Malley thinking that weed kind of sort of maybe isn’t that bad and Hillary Clinton wanting a test run in Colorado. But Bernie’s officially had a puff of that legal weed doobie, and now he’s gotta pass it. The question, is who’s next?

Photos via Tumblr, Twitter, Youtube, Giphy, and Imgur.

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