Here's What Happened at the Democratic Debate Last Night

Last night was the first Democratic Debate before the primaries, and everyone’s had a little something to say about it. The five candidates, Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders, Martin O’Malley, Jim Webb, and Lincoln Chafee, duked it out with passion to win the hearts of the American people. Unsurprisingly, Clinton and Sanders commandeered the stage, though we did get to learn quite a bit about the lesser known candidates: Jim Webb killed a guy in ‘Nam, Lincoln Chafee is actually just a rock, and that Martin O’Malley is the Uber Hot Dad. Here’s the low down on everyone’s policies and weirder moments during the debate.

Hillary Clinton

Much of the world wide web has agreed that Hillary dominated the debate last night. While we think that the Clintons are the Lannisters of this US election, Hillary was doing her very best to reposition herself as a ‘progressive,’ and of course the first women president. The presidential hopeful has been lauded for her defense of Planned Parenthood and other family/student oriented programs, on top of her her iron-clad gun control reform. She called out her biggest competition (Sanders) for being too lax.

Notable Quote: “I’m a progressive, but I’m a progressive that likes to get things done.”  

This is how we do progressive.
This is how we do progressive.

Bernie Sanders

While Clinton has been dominating headlines, Sanders has continue to chug along as the Little Candidate that Could, pulling in major support from a few different focus groups. The Cinderella story of the preliminaries, Sanders rallied hard for the issues that have gained him his popularity to begin with: income inequality, healthcare, and reforming an economic system that so heavily favors corporations. Unfortunately, when it came to foreign policy, Sanders stayed vague and seemed a little overwhelmed. However, when Clinton’s email scandal was brought up once again, he came to his rival’s aid in order to refocus to conversation on policy.

Notable Quote: Let me say — let me say something that may not be great politics. But I think the secretary is right, and that is that the American people are sick and tired of hearing about your damn e-mails.”

Are you feeling that Bern? Need some Neosporin?
Are you feeling that Bern? Need some Neosporin?

Martin O’Malley

Everyone was a little surprised by Martin O’Malley. Twitter went wild over a candidate that looked like he came right from the Hot Dad Store. While the debate was focused more on Sanders v. Clinton, O’Malley managed to get much of his policy plans across. Focusing on many similar notes as Sanders, the current Mayor of Baltimore also showed his devotion to climate change and comprehensive immigration reform.

Notable Quote: We need to understand that our country is stronger in every generation by the arrival of new American immigrants.”

Hey guys it's me, on my way to steal your presidency.
Hey guys it’s me, on my way to steal your presidency.

Jim Webb

First things first; Jim Webb wants you to know he killed a guy in ‘Nam. Outside that terrifying tidbit and smile, Webb also spent of a lot his time complaining about how much time he wasn’t getting. Unfortunately, when asked about gun control, Webb relied on the tired narrative of the mentally ill causing all of the gun problems. On the other hand, having served himself, Webb laid out a plan for foreign policy – which was lacking quite a bit in the debate.  

Notable Quote: [when asked about the enemy he’s most proud of] “I’d have to say the enemy soldier that threw the grenade that wounded me, but he’s not around right now to talk to.”

Meh meh meh, I'm Jim Webb and I didn't get enough time!
Meh meh meh, I’m Jim Webb and I didn’t get enough time!

Lincoln Chafee

We’re pretty sure Lincoln Chafee was just confused as the why he was on that stage at all. He did very little to leave an impression on anyone, thanks to his minimal talking time. This man’s receding hairline was quite literally more memorable than any of his policies. Come to think of it, he didn’t really address any policies at all, only piping up on two occasions. The first was to answer a question regarding his vote on the Glass-Stegall Act in 1999, wherein he moved to remove the separation between commercial and investment banking. The second was to make a catty comment to Hillary about her emails, which, when asked to respond, Hillary pointedly and hilariously said ‘No.’ 

Notable Quote: [when challenged by moderators on his vote on the Glass-Stegall Act] “I think you’re being a little rough.”

Who's really running for president here, this man or his hairline??
Who’s really running for president here, this man or his hairline??

Stay tuned to Milk for updates on the coming spree of debates for Election ’16!

Imagery via Reuters, Esquire.

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