A beautiful guitar, specifically for ladies.



St. Vincent Designs Guitar That's Perfect for Women's Bodies

Synth-rock superstar St. Vincent has unveiled the fruits of her latest creative endeavor, and it’s sexy as all heck. She and a team of designers at Ernie Ball Music Man have teamed up to design what many in the blogosphere have hastened to call a “guitar for specifically for women.” Which is not entirely true and kind of problematic, but we’ll get to that in a minute.

This guitar is big news for a few reasons. The first is that, while a bunch of female musicians over the decades have put their names on their own signature instruments, this is the first-ever major-market solid-body guitar ever to be designed from scratch by a woman. Also, it’s just fricking cool. There are very few things that give me joy in life—sex, drugs, rock ’n’ roll, and St. Vincent, who, if we’re being honest, is kind of a mixture of all three.

Mood: Angular and ergonomically optimized.

But when I saw a headline announcing that she had designed what might be the “world’s first female-friendly electric guitar,” I was a little confused. I thought of my guitar sitting tranquilly and benignly in its stand at home. Was it… unfriendly to me? Was it plotting some sinister scheme to kill me in my sleep? Why, oh why had no one warned me that this instrument was so dangerously male?

After a little googling, fortunately, my worries were quickly cleared up. Turns out, the point was never to make an instrument exclusively for females, and the fact that this is being perceived as such might be due in part to the fact that it’s designed by a woman. But it was consciously designed to be much lighter and slimmer than average, which, as St. Vincent said in an interview with Guitar World, might make it ideal for “smaller people and women especially.” Meaning, essentially, people like her, and people who play the way she does. Her remark that “there’s room for a breast or two” actually makes a lot more sense considering the particular way she plays guitar—way up on her body, like this:

The guitar, otherwise known as "electric boob strings."
The guitar, otherwise known as “electric boob strings.”

“I would need to travel with a chiropractor on tour in order to play [a Sixties Strat or Seventies Les Paul]” she continued. But very few people can afford the luxury of a personal chiropractor, and so this guitar is good news for everyone, regardless of sex. Especially good for those who like to jump around a lot on stage/in the basement.

And while St. Vincent’s main concern was the instrument’s practicality, she and the team at EBMM took everything into consideration—from ergonomics, balance and aesthetic appeal, to specific wood and wiring configurations that maximize sound quality and variety.

Plenty of room for definitely more than one breast.
Plenty of room for definitely more than one breast.

The guitar is available for purchase in two colors—black and “Vincent Blue”—for $1900. Small price to pay, however, for an instrument which design draws upon “Memphis design, 1960s–70s Japanese guitars, German art-pop pioneer Klaus Nomi and classic car colors,” and will arguably make you the coolest kid on the block.

The one downside? It comes only in a right-handed model. So sorry, left-handed ladies, the struggle continues.

Images via Slate, EBMM, and Suburban Apologist

Stay tuned to Milk for more St. Vincent, because while she calls herself a saint, she may actually be an angel.

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