Someone please finance this masterpiece.



Who Needs Drugs When You Have A Chinese Tupac Action Movie?

If you’ve been waiting your entire life for a Chinese action movie that revolves around a student’s class report on Tupac Shakur, we have good news for you. Someone crawled into the dark and surreal depths of YouTube, finding a movie preview for a new film coming out of China called Until the End of Time. It’s more uncomfortable and bizarre than your hearing your grandparents talk about their sex lives when they were kids. An actor named Tsalta Baptiste recently uploaded the trailer for the entire world to see, and it may inadvertently become the reason you go sober.

It starts innocently enough, with a rebellious kid listening to Tupac in class while his teacher drones on. Suddenly, he’s confronted by the teacher about a topic for his upcoming homework assignment, and he lets the music guide him toward choosing the iconic rapper. What follows is a series of events that has the tension of Eagle Eye, but the budget of Because of Winn-Dixie.

If Tupac was alive, we hope he’d give this his blessing. But he is probably alive, right?

The teacher hands him a slip of paper after class that takes him to the address of one of Tupac’s former lovers, who holds the key to unlocking a revolution that could change the world. What’s this secret revelation, you ask? It’s a top-secret interview with Tupac about thug life, intercut with scenes of the woman and Tupac flirting. Of course, these scenes have the sexual tension of two wooden planks rubbing against each other, but that’s just a small nitpick against this cinematic masterpiece. Before we could even begin to question our sanity and decide whether those background noises are actually just sound clips from Batman Begins, the action picks up faster than a snail suddenly facing a downward slope. Viewers are treated to gunshots, explosions, and a lot of running while Tupac croons in the background.

It’s an emotional rollercoaster, and it promises a wealth of material for the five people who have an ongoing conspiracy that Tupac has ties to the Chinese government. It’s also the perfect companion video to watch while you smoke your bong. There’s no word on an official release date, or any indication that they had the budget to do a full-length film, but we’ll remain hopeful.

Image via Saint Heron

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